40 Thoughts You've Probably Had If You've Ever Gone On A Run
40 Thoughts You've Probably Had If You've Ever Gone On A Run

Whether running is your favorite activity or your most dreaded type of exercise, this form of cardio does have some pretty great benefits. Not only does it burn calories, but it can also help improve your cardiovascular health, slow the effects of aging, give you a feel-good natural high, and alleviate stress and anxiety.

Plus, you don’t have to shell out a ton of money for a fancy gym membership — all you need is a sidewalk or a trail and you’re golden!

But even with all of those perks, the process of going for a run can take you through a roller coaster of emotions — from struggling to get started to reveling in a runner’s high — and a wild stream of often conflicting thoughts.

Here are just a few that might you have when you go for a run.

 

40 Thoughts You’ve Probably Had On a Run

1. It’s gorgeous out! What a perfect day for a run!

2. But now that I think about it, have so much work to do. Those dishes are piling up…my cat’s hair needs braiding, and –

3. – you know what, all my workout gear is dirty. Maybe I should go to the mall. Maybe I should just order a bunch of new clothes.

4. Is that a rain cloud I see in the distance? Looks like I might need to reschedule…

5. Stop! You’re going. You. Are. Going. You’ll feel so much better after. Think of the runner’s high! Think of the runner’s thighs!

6. How is this dynamic warm-up not the actual workout? I want to high knee my way to a king sized mattress.

7. Podcasts. I’ll just listen to a podcast to keep myself entertained and distracted.

[45 minutes later, after finally picking the perfect one…]

8. Alright, let’s do this thing! I’m pumped up and ready to go!

9. You know, this jog actually feels really good. I love feeling the wind in my hair, the sunshine on my face!

10. I can totally go faster, this is nothing!

11. Nope, can’t go faster. Might have torn a quadstring…or whatever.

12. Slow and steady. Slow and steady. Oooh, spaghetti.

13. Alright, I’m finding my stride. This isn’t so bad. It’s been what, twenty minutes?

14. It’s only been four minutes?! Absolutely kill me now.

15. What if I do less time today and just add a few minutes tomorrow?

16. What if I do less time today and also do less time tomorrow…?

17. Ohhhh, this is the BEST song! Really giving me the boost I need. DANCE PARTY!

18. Oh no. Too much dancing. Too much jamming! I’m falling!!

19. …annnnd I fell.

20. Oh crap. There’s another jogger! Get up and pretend you’ve been sprinting for sixteen miles!

21. Oh this hurts. Let’s slow it down again. Snail speed is still a speed!

22. Is running even necessary? I heard weight training is all you really need. Though I do get all my fitness advice from Snapple facts, so…

23. Wow, I’ve never really noticed how pretty the flowers are on my street! Has this park always been here? Did I run all the way down to Mexico?

24. It finally doesn’t hurt anymore! Oh wait, I’m just walking now.

25. Okay. Sprint for a minute. Jog for a minute. Walk for a minute. That’ll be three whole minutes gone before you know it!

26. Is that my heart pounding or did something inside me just break loose from all this bouncing?

27. *runs past window reflection* Who is that dork waddling around with broken wrists? Oh my god that’s me.

28. Visualize success! Pretend you are a graceful, swift gazelle!

29. Wow, I think I just hit my second wind! I feel strong! I feel healthy! I feel free!

30. It’s ONLY been two miles? Well that’s just another way of saying 10,560 feet which is another way of saying I deserve a pizza.

31. Don’t step on any of the sidewalk cracks. Don’t step on any of the sidewalk cracks.

32. I should take a video so everyone knows I’m on a run.

33. Nope. I look like a raccoon that doesn’t have air conditioning.

34. I’m so hungry.

35. I’m so sweaty.

36. Almost home, the end is near!

37. Why is my nose so runny? Is this all the toxins leaving my body?

38. My legs feel like jell-o and I have sweat in places one should never have sweat.

39. But damn, I do feel awesome. I have so much energy! I feel so alive!

40. I should do another run tomorrow.

Chelsea Frank

About

Chelsea Frank was born and bullied in Los Angeles, CA. When she's not performing stand up comedy or crying while doing squats, Chelsea writes about all things health, beauty, and travel. Her work has been featured in Shape, Uproxx, TripSavvy, The Daily Beast, Thrillist, and Reductress, among others. Fun fact: she's traveled to over 50 countries and has gotten sick in pretty much all of them!